Friday, September 25, 2009
Incomprehensible
Earlier this week there was an episode of Glee in which a kid comes out in High School and is accepted by his peers for his confidence and individuality. Today the NYtimes magazine had a piece about coming out in middle school which is completely incomprehensible to me. I'm amazed at these kids today, but at the same time I have to be a little bewildered by it. I know everyone's different, but honestly at the age of 12? I don't think I even knew what gay was. I probably wasn't really aware of my own sexuality (especially to have the confidence to rule out bisexuality or just being a phase), until I was at least 15.
I actually don't think I had my first crush on a boy until 16 actually. Up until that point it was just pretty pictures on the internet.
Regardless, it's nice to know that the younger generation is more accepting. I can't help but read these stories and wonder why I couldn't have had the balls to come out when I was in high school, or at least college, and if my life would have been less miserable. While I'm sure that is true, it also comes with the realization that I would be a very different person today, I would definitely have different friends, and everything about me would have been affected. And I like who I am and where I am, so I guess all things considered, it all worked out for the best.
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I knew I was gay when I was 12. =X
ReplyDeleteI knew I was gay when I was like 6 I think. I came out when i was 13.
ReplyDeleteMy first boycrush was the summer I turned 9. I didn't really understand it then, but I knew something was different about the way I felt about Tiger. I wrote about it at length on my blog last year, if you're interested.
ReplyDeleteThe summer I turned 11, I accidentally discovered that playing vigorously with my bits 'n' pieces was most enjoyable. Not long after, it occurred to me that two boys could suck on each other's penises at the same time! I don't think I knew anything about homosexuality at the time, but I sure knew that was something I wanted to do. As I learned more about sex, I wondered what it would be like to have sex with a girl but I don't recall ever fantasizing about it. On the other hand, I pretty much constantly fantasized about playing with boys.
This was, however, 1974 and there was no such thing as an openly gay middle schooler or high schooler. Hell, openly gay anything was not acceptable. It blows my mind how much things have changed.
Were I in middle school now, I'm not sure if I would have the courage to come out. Then again, seeing as I already pretty much knew in elementary school, maybe I would.
I'm with you. I didn't have my first real crush till about 14/15.
ReplyDeleteTook me years to come out though. Regardless of what was said in the article, coming out at my school would have been social suicide.
I knew I was gay right around 12 or 13... I think as soon as I discovered the web (via excite.com) and porn, I knew. Of course, it took me another 13 years to come out to my family and friends.
ReplyDeleteI watched that episode of Glee, and fell in love with the show just that much more. I played football for a semester (defensive end) back in high school... I genuinely wish I had come out in high school -- I went to an all guy's school which was a "kill or be killed" social atmosphere anyway... I wonder what being on the football team would've been like as an out guy?